And WHY do I homeschool again??!?

Two blogs in one day! No, I'm not feeling particularly creative today. Writing is an outlet for me, and right now I need to VENT. So, brace yourself. If you are having a Happy Homeschool The-World-Is-So-Wonderful-Day, I suggest you don't read any further. Because what I am about to say will pop your little homeschooling bubble.

Disclaimer for First-Time-Homeschoolers: Yes, these days do occur. If you think otherwise you probably should not be homeschooling. Yes, that is my opinion. It's also my blog. ;)

Let me 'splain.

Today has been one of those days where I can understand why some species eat their young. I even said that to my 15-year old today!! First of all, I woke up at 4:30 am (FOUR-THIRTY IN THE MORNING) and could not go back to sleep. Four, no five, make that six, antihistamine and a major allergy attack later, I was drinking my coffee, relishing the peace and quiet before I heard the pitter-patter of little feet, and the stomping of big feet. (Why do teenagers walk like elephants?) The first irritation of the day came when I realized the child responsible for bringing in the groceries last night neglected their duties and LEFT THEM IN THE CAR. Which meant (get ready now) I DID NOT HAVE FLAVORED CREAMER IN MY COFFEE. Just plain. (By the way, hubby took the car to work, so it was not a matter of simply going outside to get the groceries.) You coffee drinkers understand me here, especially you Moms out there who are addicted to, I mean drink coffee. It is one of the few pleasures I enjoy during my day. I drink my coffee, wake up, have my devotions, check my email, etc. and basically get ready for the day. Is a little flavored creamer too much to ask?

Then I made the mistake of waking up the children. I should have, repeat, should have let them sleep. Because as soon as they awakened, they needed to eat. And as soon as they needed to eat my carefully straightened kitchen and dining room was quickly in a state of disrepair. Sigh.

After breakfast I decided to tackle cleaning the stove and refrigerator. I know - why?? Well, our property manager was sending out someone to inspect the stove and fridge - and I wanted whoever was coming to look at them to think that I actually cleaned them once in awhile. Little do they actually know...

Anyway, I assigned one child the task of washing dishes. For whatever blessed reason that child got sidetracked not once, not twice...but three, make that four times. The first time they were mesmerized by something on the tv. The second time they decided it was time to check on the dog. The third time they went to change clothes. The fourth time they chose to CLEAN THEIR SHOES ON THE TABLE. No, I am not kidding. By this time, with no flavored creamer to sweeten me up, I was a tad frustrated. I gave this child THE LOOK and asked them, "WHAT are you DOING?" This child actually had the audacity to look surprised and then said, (and I am not kidding) "Well Mom, I decided that since you were using the scrubber on the stove that I would do this first, because I can't wash dishes without it." HUH?? My kids all think I was born yesterday. I'm not sure what planet this child is from but I proceeded to inform them that it is possible to wash dishes with a WASHCLOTH. What a novel idea!!

Later in the day while we were having school, I was doing our daily Bible reading, and I swear that every possible way to wiggle, act up, or be naughty possessed not just the little ones, but the big ones too. Actually my youngest was probably the best behaved of the lot. I try not to be a Nazi during Bible reading but in my opinion that is the most important part of our school day. I expect the kids to respectfully listen, although I do let them draw or color. I was not able to allow even that today, because drawing became "I wonder if I can color on my brother's skin with this marker" and "how far can I rip this paper" and "If I eat this paper will it taste good?" and a scrillion other little naughty things. So I took away the paper and tried to sound reasonably cheerful during the rest of Bible reading. It's hard to sound cheerful when reading Leviticus though.

After phonics with the Little Ones, I had them pick up the living room (all those bits of paper they didn't eat were on the floor) and an argument erupted over who owned what scissor. An argument also erupted down the hall with the Big Ones who were doing spelling. So I referreed the Big Ones, broke up the fight among the Little Ones, then retreated to my bedroom. If I can just make it to bed time...if I can just make it to bed time....

Shortly after sitting down to relax for a moment I heard the loudest slam I have ever, ever heard from the door downstairs. Turns out a visiting friend was mad about something. I had the sense to thank God no fingers were severed. And the dog wasn't in the way. She'd have been cut in half, I just know it. I reprimanded the offender...and sent the whole group to the park. Now it is quiet in the house. Ahhh...

I think I'm going to go lock the door!!